Excuses go out the window. They know the real fear is living a life where they have settled or compromised what they really wanted. How do you adopt that mindset and perspective? Imagine yourself when you are 80 years old, nearing the end of your life. You are sitting in your rocking chair, reflecting on how you lived your life. Now, look back on your life as if you had not achieved the goal you are after at this moment in your life.
How has this affected the course of your life? What are your regrets? What do you wish you had made more time for? What do you wish you had tried? Is there sadness and regret? People often give up on what they want because they believe that reaching their goal is beyond their abilities. But the most successful people foster a growth mindset. And when faced with a setback, they work harder. They adopt a new strategy.
They keep seeking a solution. Instead, they find new ways to adapt and work harder to achieve their goals. So what do I really want? Remember, we are built to adapt. So embrace your inner strength and use each experience as a tool to help you learn more about yourself and what you really must have in life.
Mastering your emotions and changing your mindset is psychological — but would you be surprised to learn that the psychological is also physical? When something scary happens, in that moment, we are on high alert and not preoccupied with other things that might be on our mind getting in trouble at work, worrying about a big test the next day , which brings us to the here and now. Furthermore, when we experience these frightening things with the people in our lives, we often find that emotions can be contagious in a positive way.
We are social creatures, able to learn from one another. While each of these factors - context, distraction, social learning - have potential to influence the way we experience fear, a common theme that connects all of them is our sense of control. That perception of control is vital to how we experience and respond to fear. It is important to keep in mind that everyone is different, with a unique sense of what we find scary or enjoyable.
This raises yet another question: While many can enjoy a good fright, why might others downright hate it? Any imbalance between excitement caused by fear in the animal brain and the sense of control in the contextual human brain may cause too much, or not enough, excitement.
On the other hand, if the experience is not triggering enough to the emotional brain, or if is too unreal to the thinking cognitive brain, the experience can end up feeling boring.
So if the emotional brain is too terrified and the cognitive brain helpless, or if the emotional brain is bored and the cognitive brain is too suppressing, scary movies and experiences may not be as fun. The minute you question your thoughts and beliefs, you start to create distance, allowing you space to take a witness position to your thoughts. This starts to loosen fear's hold on you right away. Einstein said, "The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe.
But when you trust that you are held, loved, safe, nurtured, and protected, you can relax. Whether you subscribe to any specific religion or just consider yourself "spiritual but not religious," anything that facilitates your trust in a friendly universe can help you move beyond fear.
It's really hard to make this kind of radical transformation alone! Find other spiritually inclined, courageous beings who are making brave choices to be their most authentic selves.
And limit your exposure to people who let fear run their lives without judging them. Our FREE doctor-approved gut health guide. You are now subscribed Be on the lookout for a welcome email in your inbox! Main Navigation. Log in Profile. Saved Articles. Contact Support. Log Out. Your cart is empty. Our online classes and training programs allow you to learn from experts from anywhere in the world. Explore Classes. Physician and New York Times bestselling author.
Lissa Rankin, M. Lissa has starred in two National Public Television specials and also leads workshops, both online and at retreat centers like Esalen and Kripalu. Last updated on February 26, You find yourself striving in vain for an impossible-to-achieve standard of perfection.
You settle for less than your dreams. Indeed, fear and uncertainty are strong emotions and natural responses to things that we don't understand that threaten our safety and health. Here's how fear influences our behavior, and how to cope. Your body's fear response starts in a region of the brain called the amygdala, she explains. Several natural physiological changes take place that help us prepare to be more efficient in a dangerous situation: our pupils dilate, our breathing accelerates and our heart rate and blood pressure rise, she says.
While this is a normal human response, it can feel like your amygdala is in overdrive. In the face of fear, you might turn to different behavioral patterns than normal like loading up on toilet paper , Murray says. The way to combat this is to "pull ourselves more into the rational brain," she says.
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